Some tips on how to resolve conflicts in marriage to become the good parent that you could be

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FROM THERE TO ETERNITY. Back when we were at a dating stage.

A strong, healthy marriage is the foundation of good parenting. Parents start as a husband and wife first before they become father and mother. A husband and wife may have unresolved personal and marital issues and these could adversely affect their ability to parent.

When marital conflicts begin to surface, couples end up wondering if they have made a mistake. Their partner does not seem to be the same person they thought they were marrying. There must be something wrong and that’s not what they’re bargaining for from the very beginning.

 There’s no such thing as a perfect formula for resolving conflicts in marriage. Conflicts within marriage are one of the most common problems of the family. It is but normal and natural to have disagreements from time to time.

No two spouses ever agree on everything all of the time. But what’s important is in the way of expressing such a disagreement that could spell the difference.

Once you enter the married life, you would soon discover, not only at the beginning of your marriage but all throughout, that a relationship involves making a lot of sacrifices or the giving up of one’s desire in favor of the other. Success in marriage, therefore, depends upon the efforts and sacrifices exerted not just by one, but by the couple together in their day-to-day relations. Most importantly, it is measured by how much the couple is willing to give unconditional love to each other.

 A lot of people would like to think that marriage is about living together happily ever after with the love of your life and kids. In reality, it’s not always the case. There are many marriages that ended up broken while those that have managed to hold on are, little by little, deteriorating.

But there are ways to improve a couple’s relationship and with a lot of work, patience, and love and compassion could lead you both to a closer satisfactory union. Here are some tips on how to iron out conflicts in your marriage:

PUTTING GOD IN THE CENTER

You have to believe it was God who gave you your life partner and it is your duty and responsibility to cherish and love him or her as a sign of appreciation to the Giver. It was God who leads you to each other to commit your life in a vow that says “till death do us part.” Make sure that He remains part and parcel of your life together.

COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY

Like in other aspects of group of life, communication is a very important tool in helping fix the wear and tear of a marriage. Once either of the couple fails to communicate to the other effectively, then marriage suffers. It has been found out that the majority of conflicts among couples, across families which could even lead to broken homes, are due to failure of communication.

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SWEETHEARTS THEN AND NOW. My wife and me having a date some five years ago.

ADJUST, ADJUST, AND ADJUST

Continuous adjustment is important in marriage since no two individuals are alike. When making any adjustments, it should be such that marital conflicts are well tolerable. The husband and wife should be awakened to the realization of the fact that they have to find ways to honor differences and to work together for the good of their marriage.

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE

If it is possible, stop criticizing your partner. Yes, even if you think what you’re going to say to him or her is constructive. Stop criticizing. Instead, you may try suggesting the behavior you desire from him or her. Often, you only notice the mistakes of your partner that you take for granted the good things he or she has done for you.

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