Eight simple ways to renew your marriage

marriage
This picture was taken when me and my wife were just dating several years ago.

When a man marries a woman, he commits himself to a process by which he would as well be sharing it with his wife. They would never continue to be the same man and woman but would grow and modify themselves into the best that they could be, discovering new ideas as well as to develop new gifts. The couple should come to embrace each other’s differences and similarities, that is, by way of honoring their differences and in the appreciation of similarities.

Marriage is the very foundation by which families are being built. A strong marriage produces healthy families that produce well-mannered and productive children. It’s sad to hear about some broken marriages resulting to broken families. But some things are not meant to be and God alone knows why.

There are ways in which you could revive or refresh your dying relationship with your spouse. As a couple, both of you are more than capable in creating a new reality for your own selves and in your marriage. All that’s needed is for each one of you to have that energy, imagination, and dedication to renew your vow, but you may as well try these:

BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER

It’s always a wise move to understand what your partner is saying and feeling. When your partner has a concern to express, entertain what such a concern is all about by discussing it with her and to offer what best you could do about it.

When you’re listening to your partner, whatever his or her concern, you’re giving your partner your undivided attention. Never interrupt with him or her, stop being judgmental, don’t respond defensively, and try listening with new ears. When you have these qualities, even what your partner isn’t saying you could also hear.

HAVE A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR

Laughter, as we all know, is the best medicine. When someone is laughing, his or her mood changes immediately. Laughter is one best way to take away the gloom out of a person by raising the spirits, quelling fear, and stopping the tears of sorrow.

You don’t even have to become a stand-up comic to bring laughter into the relationship. But as long as you’re helping each other to see the comedic in everyday living and to be amused by life’s many foibles, then that’s it. Laughter, with its ability to mitigate pain, acts as a buffer against hard, trying times.

CREATE SOME PERSONAL SPACE FOR SELF-RENEWAL

Take a break. Life could be too busy so that it leaves you physically exhausted, emotionally irritable, and spiritually depleted. Try spending at least twenty minutes of your precious time each day to recharge your battery.

Spend it praying, reflecting, meditating, reading the Bible, and simply just to be alone and quiet. It is during these silent moments that you’re searching your heart out for what could rejuvenate it. Once you’re able to find that peace within you is when you become more responsive and focused on your partner.

SOLVE PROBLEMS TOGETHER

Usually, when there’s an emerging crisis in marriage, couples are pulling apart instead of pulling together. Take such a trying time as an opportunity for you to empower your relationship by introducing ideas and developing solutions that strengthen the marriage.

Remember the old adage that says: “United we stand, divided we fall.”  There’s strength in unity and togetherness. As long as couples solve problems as a team, they would make it through.

MAKE ROOM FOR EMPATHY

It is best to try putting yourself in your partner’s place. Try to understand your partner like, for example, when she’s not feeling well, don’t respond harshly.

When your partner is edgy or irritable, don’t pass judgment quickly but be more tolerant. Later, as you try to gain insight into your partner’s mood, you would be thanking yourself for not acting harshly which could have ended up to a dispute.

KEEP LOVING

The most challenging part is how to keep the love alive when you’re ignored, pushed aside, held back, rejected, and hurt. It could be done through persistent effort. Don’t stop loving.

Remember that the heart keeps beating even in the damaged body. It has to be the same with how we should love. We should never be losing faith in love despite all of life’s disappointments.

THINK POSITIVELY

Whenever you had a fight or a disagreement with your partner, instead of getting angry or hating your partner, try thinking of all the things that you loved about him or her. That’s called the “right attitude.” There are no perfect relationships and that quarrels or disagreements happen.

It has a lot to do about how to deal with such a situation though. It’s all up to you and you have to decide whether you would allow such a thing to destroy your relationship or not. Thinking positively would place your relationship in the right track.

DO A LOT OF THINGS TOGETHER

You’re a couple so you’re supposed to do a lot of things together. Have fun together regularly. Solve problems together. Cry together. Laugh together.

Engage in fun activities together. Walk together in the park. Run together. Watch a sporting event together. Attend a concert together. Go to church together. There are a lot of things in which a couple could do together. It would make bond stronger each time.

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