If there is someone who knows more than the way we raise children, they are no other than our own children. They are with us, interacting, communicating, and all things in between every day. Yes, they are on the front line with us every day, so to speak, so that, to some extent, we are forming a continuous cycle of information feedback with them.
This allows us to know if our actions and reactions are balanced or if we weigh too much in one direction or another. But for us to interpret the signals accurately, though, we must rely a lot on the cognitive and rational parts of ourselves. We must be careful and know with certainty that if we only react from the primitive survival instincts, we can only make many mistakes.
A lot has been said and done about raising children, and it can also open our own wounds. This is because the upbringing of children makes us vulnerable to terrifying emotions. We can feel many emotional upheavals as a result of our lives so entangled with them. However, we must be careful because, in the midst of such emotional attacks, we could confuse our children with the enemy. What is more dangerous is if we are not able to distinguish them from ourselves.
We can use our eyes and ears to observe and take note of our child’s behavior, interests, ways of relating to others, the degree of self-motivation, and emotional patterns. The main guideline here is that we, the parents, practice impartiality, verify what we are seeing against what we might have expected to see and let go of preconceived notions.